Holmes and Watson discuss the Wagatha Christie case. A dark tale of pointless nonsense.

But Elementary, my Dear Reader

Chris Welsby
5 min readJun 1, 2022


Image by Gerd Altmann on Pixabay


The term “Wagatha Christie” refers to a Defamation of Character court case held in London in May 2022. WAGS is the term used to describe Wives and Girlfriends of professional footballers. The defendant (a WAG) set a trap for the plaintiff (another WAG) in true Agatha Christie (thriller writer) fashion.

Rebekah Vardy (WAG) is the plaintiff and “victim”. She is the wife of Leicester City and England footballer Jamie Vardy. She has been slandered, libeled even. Her character has been defamed.

She has been accused of leaking confidential information to newspapers about her one time friend and fellow celebrity (and WAG) Coleen Rooney. Coleen is the husband of former Manchester United and England footballer Wayne Rooney.

Rebekah says she didn’t do it. Coleen says “Oh yes she did.” Neither would back down or compromise, so to court they went……..

Scene: 221b Baker Street, London, England, NW1 5SH. Holmes is reading The Times, Watson is reading The Daily Star.

Watson: I can’t make head nor tail of it, Holmes. Blessed if I can see what the fuss is about.

Holmes: Rudimentary my dear Watson. The lady called Coleen was having her confidential information leaked to the press. This top secret information was circulated on social media only to her close friends, and the lady called Rebekah had access to it. Circumstantial evidence pointed to her involvement in the leak.

Watson: Top secret information you say. Was it government secrets, MI5 papers and that sort of thing.

Holmes: No, it was more like what the Rooney’s were having for tea. How many bathrooms they had in their new house and where they were getting their new shoes from. That sort of thing.

And so Collen set a trap, Watson. She posted some information on a closed social media group which was sent only to Rebekah. And when the relevant information was made public, then in Coleen’s eyes it was game, set and match.

Watson: Great Scott, Holmes. Unbelievable.



Chris Welsby

Just passing through….writing about Internet Marketing, Life, Health, and crafting Short Stories about Relationships. Lives in North West England.